Simple Ways to Start Restoring Intimacy in Your Relationship

Last time, we chatted about the common reasons for intimacy problems in a relationship. If you haven’t read it yet, you can check it out here. Today, we talk about how we can begin restoring intimacy in your relationship.

When emotional distance has become a habit, you increase the likelihood of relationship breakdown. The risk of not opening up is far greater than the risk of being honest. Resolving intimacy issues very often requires both people to be open, honest, considerate and non-judgemental. It also requires vulnerability. Let’s get started.

  1. Work on your communication skills

Talking about your problems is one of the very best things you can do. Because remember, it is you two verse the problem, not you two verse each other. By talking about concerns and worries, you can ‘get things out in the open’. Be mindful that effective communication is a two-way street – it is as much about listening as it is about talking. And definitely remember that nothing will get resolved unless you keep calm and discuss the situation. Don’t let it escalate into a fight.

  1. Work on resolving conflict

The capacity to calmly manage feelings of anger and frustration is key to restoring intimacy. It is much easier to feel close and connected to someone when you haven’t had a heated argument or fight. So, when discussing the problem, think before you speak and be honest and vulnerable. Listen to one another! And if you feel the tension rising, it’s okay to take a step back, have a break, and pick up the conversation at another time when you are both more level-headed.

  1. Do activities together

As the saying goes, the couple that plays together, stays together. Find interests that you both enjoy, make plans and, most importantly, stick to them. It doesn’t have to be an expensive dinner or night out, but it can be – whatever you both enjoy doing. Take some time for a little date. Experiencing things together is a sure-fire way to strength the connection between you two.

  1. Talk to a relationship counsellor/coach

Couples counselling (or relationship counselling) works to help people overcome conflict. Alternatively, seeing a relationship coach before problems become unmanageable is a proactive, effective step that can improve a relationship.